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One
of the shallowest shortcomings of television is that it
ages the actresses prematurely. Why is there such a dearth
of middle-aged and aged female actors on television? And
why must the existent ones insist on looking glamorous beyond
reason? Apara Mehta who’s now a ‘par-nani’
(great grandmom) on Kyunkii Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi has
no grey hair worth talking about.
Speaking
of Kyunki… the Karan Johar touch is very much
in evidence in this soap also. Suddenly we have a great
deal of split-screen, double and triple happenings on screen
with a timer ticking away with ‘real’ time at
the bottom of the screen. Wow, Kyunki har saans (breath)
bhi kabhi bahut thi!!
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Ekta
Kapoor had tried her hand at doing a Sanjay Leela Bhansali in
Kahani Terri Merri. It flopped. Apparently Karan Johar
is luckier for Ekta. He sure was a good-luck charm for the six
contestants on Indian Idol who made it to the Top 10. Johar
who appeared as the celebrity guest on the show showered all the
contestants with the highest praise possible.
Prajakta
came in for special commendation. “Ever since she came on
the show (anchor) Mini Mathur and Farah Khan have been trying
to look specially glamorous,” Karan quipped.
*****
All
three ladies simpered simultaneously. Never had seen Farah Khan
do that before. Since it was a Republic Day-special all the contestants
were required to sing patriotic songs. Karan’s favourite
Prajakta sang Ae mere watan ke logon prompting Sonu Nigam to observe,
“You’ve sung a song that’s been rendered by this
country’s greatest singer ever (Lata Mangeshkar). Hats off
to you for your guts.”
I
agree. The Nightingale isn’t just the greatest singer but
also the hugest icon this country has ever produced. Will the
news channels please stop disrespecting her? I was appalled when
last week after Parveen Babi’s death, Aaj Tak actually made
bold to call the Nightingale to ask her opinion on the actress’
death.
The
reluctant icon was repeatedly heard saying she hardly knew the
actress, and that they had never met. And yet the desperate and
pushy female correspondent kept asking Lataji to comment on Babi’s
death.
*****
Worse
still was the macabre coverage of Parveen Babi’s funeral
on India TV. They kept showing the same visuals and repeating
the words (“Hardly anyone from the film industry is here…
Parveen Babi lived and died alone…” blah blah) for almost
an hour.
Damn,
they couldn’t even get her name right. Some correspondents
called her ‘Bobby’ others called her ‘Baby’.
How all this would’ve infuriated the lady, I shudder to think.
The insensitivity displayed by the news channels during a celebrity’s
death is unbelievable. They just go on and on creating a sense
of drama out of the tragedy.
*****
Caught up with Bobby Darling, the drag queen from Bollywood on
Zoom. Among other things that shocked us, the woman born as a
man told us ‘she’ wanted silicone implantations and
a sex change, that ‘she’ and Mallika Sherawat were identical
(in what way, Bobby didn’t specify) and that ‘she’
wanted to go to bed with Akshay Kumar.
(Mentioned
this to Akshay Kumar and he said, "What can I say? I’m
flattered!")
Republic
Day… and caught Pooja Bedi in conversation with Anupam Kher
on censoring policies. Pooja wore a really low-cut dress which
must have made it very difficult for her guest to concentrate
on his words. But Kher managed. That’s what makes him a good
actor. He even managed to cut down Ms Bedi’s claims of liberalism
and open-air policy and reminded her that all of India’s
population wasn’t as liberal as she was.
“Translate
Vagina Monologues into Hindi and then tell me,” Kher barked.
Ms Bedi heaved dramatically. “My Hindi is weak… I don’t
know the Hindi words for vagina and monologue.”
*****
Oh
dear. And from Bobby Darling to Bobby Deol… He joined his
shy brother Sunny for Karan Johar’s show. Now Sunny isn’t
quite the camera-friendly chat-show favourite that Abhishek Bachchan
is. (In fact Abhishek’s installment with his dad on Koffee
With Karan was so popular he’s being re-invited to the
show, this time with Preity Zinta as his guest). Not once did
Sunny look into the camera. He mumbled apologetically, fumbled
over his sentences and wept when Dad Dharmendra sent a recorded
message to his two puttars.
All
quite sentimental wholesome and down-to-earth. But when compared
with Karan’s other articulate guests Sunny seemed quite out
of place.
And
finally the Screen awards… host Sajid Khan copied an entire
chunk of his gig from Billy Crystal’s act at the last Oscars
awards wherein the camera zoomed in one one nominee after another
as the host ‘read’ his/her thought.
Forget
about our films being plagiarised. Even our awards ceremonies
are unoriginal.
(The
views expressed here are those of the author and indiantelevision.com
need not necessarily subscribe to the same)
Polished
and fast-moving… it certainly is. But I’m yet to figure
out which way the plot is heading… Is it a family drama inspired
by Ekta’s buddy Karan Johar’s Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham?
Looks like it. Because one of the episodes featured a family celebration
straight out of K3G, along with veteran actress Achala Sachdev
to remind us of the Johar in the crown.
