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'Tomorrow
is Dussehra…And I’m going to set the nation on fire….'
That was some Sherawat speak for you, on Aaj Tak on Thursday.
I
can't for the life of me figure out why the TV channels chose to
highlight Sherawat’s twin assets - namely her large mouth and
larger ego, when throughout the promotional campaign for her new
film she kept repeating the same "Mallika magic mantras"
for self promotion.
By
now her purported shock tactics have become too predictable to have
their desired --- or shall I say, desirable? --- effect. Her comments
on the censor board (geriatics are her favourite brunt of ridicule)
and on her single status ('Mallika is alone, sigh sigh, giggle giggle')
have become boring and bland through endless repetition.
And
to be subjected to her 'bold' tirade twice on the same channel on
Friday evening was a bit too much. In the both the interviews, she
rattled off her shallow shockers with the expertise of a roadside
monkey trickster. For some strange reason, as she spoke Aaj Tak
flashed horny footage from an earlier film rather than the new one.
That
made the junta suspicious. Evidently there was nothing steamy, seamy
or see-me about the new one!
See
how an unthinking over-done campaign can go against a film? It’s
about time the news channels stopped inviting unit members of every
film on release. It’s just not convinving any longer.
****
 Homework
anyone?
NDTV’s generally-efficient Srinivas Jain was reduced to an
embarrassing state of hemming and hawing, when he had the makers
of the new NRI film Flavors over.
Now
to me as potential viewer, Flavors looked like an interesting
film. I’d have liked to know more about its motivations. Jain
just hadn’t done enough homework to get me interested.
****
Who
needs enemies??
What continues to be interesting, is the upbeat spirit displayed
on Zee’s India’s Best. This week the uncontrollable
Sajid Khan was invited over for a friendly tete-a-tete with the
contestants. I say this with a great sense of irony. Because Sajid’s
purported pep talk turned out to be an exercise in sadism.
He
first asked a wannabe to come on stage and strip. Fortunately the
wannabe was a male. Sajid then told him would he make a producer’s
nights “colourful” because , according to him that’s
how roles are promised to newcomers.
“How
many of you want to do TV serials? None? Why? You think you’re
tood good for serials? I say none of you is good enough for the
movies.”
Oh
dear. What was this meant to be? Sajid Khan’s own private Gestapo
service? And just what was the purpose of the whole exercise? To
scare off the hopefuls? Isn’t that like cutting off the hands
of the masons who were building the Taj Mahal? Or whatever….
****
Playing
the same old trick
 This
week I was quite taken up with Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhie Bahu Thi.
The character Vishal (Rohit Bakshi) was shot at in a cable-car in
some Swiss hamlet and fell to his death. Bloodcurdling screams from
his shocked wife, stupefaction, disbelief rage and grief imprinted
in Tulsi’s face…. It all added up to a great Indian soap
trick.
And
let me also mention the use of black-and-white frames with colour
showing only in the blood on the victim’s face, the bindi on
his widow’s forehead and the roses that she had brought along
for him, heightened the poignancy of the moment many times over.
****
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The Kapoor dame still has it
Like it or not Ekta Kapoor is the only one doing innovative
work in the soaps. But avid Ekta–eyeballers complain
that she is making death very proud by roping in Lord Yama
(the god of death) every time the ratings need to be boosted.
In fact this whole death business was turned into a terrific
joke on the anniversary celebrations of Kahaani Ghar
Ghar Kii.
Here
was the gag: some cast members were called aside and told
they were being bumped off in the serial.
The
way they reluctantly lay down on their pyres, provided ghoulish
giggles , and quite a departure from the usual grim goings-on
in the soap.
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Same old story... ahhh what a bore
Zee’s new daily Kareena Kareena doesn’t
seem to have much to offer, and never mind the double evocation
of a very successful cine star’s name. The working class
comedy about a small-town girl with starry dreams has already
been done to …. giggle giggle … death in Sony's Jassi
Jassi Koi Nahi and Yeh Meri Life Hai. Kareena...
is plainly tacky. The couple that hires the protagonist to work
can act. But the girl who plays Kareena can’t.
 So
sad. Kareena Kareena seems to be another na-na for Zee.
Kareena… reminds me of Karisma on Star’s long-running
Kehta Hai Dil. The soap has got to have the broadest performance
ever by Grusha Kapoor as the shrewish mother-in-law. Forget any
claims to subtlety, Kapoor lets her emotions hang out like billowing
washing from a clothes line.
And
now her daughter-in-law Karisma has turned into a lawyer to defend
her love-interest against her own husband, played by Salil Ankola.
Drama ? Hai Rama!
****
 Tsk
Tsk task
It is just fine to have professionals from other spheres walking
into cinema. But surely the Ankolas of the sports world should
make sure they lend their names to serials that at least use them
suitably.
****
Seedhe
sawal, uljhe jawaab
 And
how can we not mention Anupam Kher who this week was so much in
the news, he WAS news! Besides all the new bulletins, Kher also
did Aaj Tak’s Q&A Seedhi Baat with Prabhu Chawla
where the star-guest addressed his host by his first name until
midway and then quickly and quietly added a ‘ji’ to
it in the second half.
Hostility begets distance, huh?
(The views
expressed here are those of the author and indiantelevision.com
need not necessarily subscribe to the same)
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